The God Kind of Love (part 10)

Fifteen Characteristics of the God Kind of Love (5)

Love keeps no lists of wrongs!

7.21.2024

How do you react when you are mistreated in some way?

We are to respond in love…

Here’s the backdrop of today’s relational climate:

2 Timothy 3:1-5 (NLT)

The Dangers of the Last Days

You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. 2 For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. 3 They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. 4 They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. 5 They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that!

We can choose to let the world dominate us, or we can counter with the God kind of love.

During Paul’s day, the relational pressure was intense for believers. They were being persecuted by the Roman government and life was tense…

1 Corinthians 13:1-7 (MSG)

1 If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate.

2 If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing.

3-7 If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.

Love never gives up.

Love cares more for others than for self.

Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.

Love doesn’t strut,

Doesn’t have a swelled head,

Doesn’t force itself on others,

Isn’t always “me first,”

Doesn’t fly off the handle,

Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,

Doesn’t revel when others grovel,

Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,

Puts up with anything,

Trusts God always,

Always looks for the best,

Never looks back,

But keeps going to the end.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV)

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

15 Characteristics of Love from 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

We covered seven of the 15 characteristics:

1. Love is willing to suffer a long time – Love suffers long…

2. Love treats people kindly.

3. Love is not jealous.

4. Love does not brag.

5. Love is not proud.

6. Love is not rude.

7. The God kind of love puts others first.

8. Love will not respond with anger and offense.

Today:

9. Love does not keep lists of wrongs.

Thinks no evil

(God’s Word) It doesn’t keep track of wrongs.

(Contemporary English Version) It doesn’t keep a record of wrongs that others do.

(East to Read Version) Love does not remember wrongs done against it.

(New Living Translation) it keeps no record of being wronged.

(New Century Version) Love does not count up wrongs that have been done.

(The Message Paraphrase) Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,

(Amplified) – Takes no account of the evil done to it: pays no attention to a suffered wrong.

Greek – logizomai

to take an inventory, i.e. estimate (literally or figuratively):

Despise, esteem, impute, lay, number, reason, reckon, suppose, think (on).

Love keeps no record of wrongs.

The Greek word here is logizomai and means to take an inventory.

It means to make a list in your mind of what someone does to harm or bother you or to remember when someone does you wrong.

This is a fleshly trait that we must choose to resist.

God’s love in us keeps no record of wrongs.

 

This characteristic is perhaps one of the best gauges of whether or not we’re walking in love.

When you are talking to your spouse or children, do you bring up their past offenses?

Do you remind them over and over again – of what they forgot to do, or of what they have done or said? Love doesn’t.

We have left love behind when we start holding others’ offenses against them and start making lists in our minds of their offenses against us.

We are to love the way God does!

Ephesians 5:1-2 (NKJV)

Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. 2 And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma.

Imitators

(Dake Study Bible Notes) Greek: mimetes – imitators; mimic the gait, speech, accent, and manner of life of another (note, 1Cor. 4:16). It means here to imitate God as children do their parents–imitate His acts, words, nature, ways, graces, and Spirit.

Ephesians 5:1 (PHILLIPS)

As children copy their fathers you, as God’s children, are to copy him. Live your lives in love—the same sort of love which Christ gives us and which he perfectly expressed when he gave himself up for us in sacrifice to God.

Ephesians 5:1-2 (MSG)

Watch what God does, and then you do it, like children who learn proper behavior from their parents. 2 Mostly what God does is love you. Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that.

What if God held our sins against us?

What would it be like to go to God and He reminds you of what you did last Thursday, or what you said yesterday when you were angry?

Would you want to worship Him?

Would you want to spend time with Him?

Would you feel like He wanted you around Him?

Listen to God’s Word about how He deals with your past sins:

God chooses to forget our sins when He forgives us.

He doesn’t carry a list around waiting to remind us of our past.

1 John 1:9 (NLT)

But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.

Hebrews 10:16-18 (NKJV)

This is the covenant that I will make with them after those days, says the LORD: I will put My laws into their hearts, and in their minds I will write them,” 17 then He adds, “Their sins and their lawless deeds I will remember no more.” 18 Now where there is remission of these, there is no longer an offering for sin.

Ephesians 4:31-32 (NLT)

Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. 32 Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

Psalms 103:1-4 (NKJV)

Bless the LORD, O my soul; and all that is within me, bless His holy name! 2 Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits: 3 Who forgives all your iniquities, Who heals all your diseases, 4 Who redeems your life from destruction, Who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies,

Psalms 103:8-13 (NLT)

The LORD is compassionate and merciful, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. 9 He will not constantly accuse us, nor remain angry forever. 10 He does not punish us for all our sins; He does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve. 11 For His unfailing love toward those who fear Him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth. 12 He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west. 13 The LORD is like a father to His children, tender and compassionate to those who fear Him.

Isaiah 43:25 (NKJV)

I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions for My

own sake; and I will not remember your sins.

Isaiah 43:25 (NLT)

I—yes, I alone—will blot out your sins for my own sake and will never think of them again.

Psalms 145:8-9 (NLT)

The LORD is merciful and compassionate, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. 9 The LORD is good to everyone. He showers compassion on all His creation.

So if we imitate God, should we forgive others and get rid of the mental lists we hold about what they have done?

Should we bring up in conversation what a person did to us a week ago, or six months ago, or 3 years ago?

Get rid of your lists.

The lists keeps us from being close to a person.

If you are married, you may find emotions that are turned off if you keep lists!

In our daily relationships, we are to pay no attention when others do things that we don’t like.

I often give an illustration from the 80’s of a guy who came into my office with a huge computer-generated list of his wife’s offenses towards him – date, time, offense!

My first pastor accused me of rebellion when I told him of some things I was feeling in prayer! I had to choose to forgive him and let it go!

A man I worked with in 1980 in Tulsa ignored me for weeks during work hours. I had crossed a picket line he was on while picketing for higher wages in the meat market of the store.

I treated him as though he never did it! Love never fails!

As a young man in my early twenties, these incidents taught me an invaluable lesson as to the power of agape love. Love never fails!

Jesus held no lists on the cross.

Luke 23:33-34 (NKJV)

And when they had come to the place called Calvary, there they crucified Him, and the criminals, one on the right hand and the other on the left. 34 Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” And they divided His garments and cast lots.

Stephen held on to no lists as he was martyred.

Acts 7:59-60 (NKJV)

And they stoned Stephen as he was calling on God and saying, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” 60 Then he knelt down and cried out with a loud voice, “Lord, do not charge them with this sin.” And when he had said this, he fell asleep.

We do have the ability to love the unlovely and the cantankerous!

As a pastor over the years, I have chosen to make no lists with any person.

Is there a person in your life that you carry a mental list with?

I want to have a teddy bear heart and alligator hide as I get older!

The exception to this rule:

The other side of this which I will address in detail later is that there is a place for discipline that calls a person out for behavior that harms others.

2 Timothy 4:14-16 (NKJV)

Alexander the coppersmith did me much harm. May the Lord repay him according to his works. 15 You also must beware of him, for he has greatly resisted our words.

16 At my first defense no one stood with me, but all forsook me. May it not be charged against them.

2 Thessalonians 3:6 (NLT)

And now, dear brothers and sisters, we give you this command in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ: Stay away from all believers who live idle lives and don’t follow the tradition they received from us.

Titus 3:10-11 (NLT)

If people are causing divisions among you, give a first and second warning. After that, have nothing more to do with them. 11 For people like that have turned away from the truth, and their own sins condemn them.

Acts 20:29-30 (NLT)

I know that false teachers, like vicious wolves, will come in among you after I leave, not sparing the flock. 30 Even some men from your own group will rise up and distort the truth in order to draw a following.

1 Corinthians 5:9-11 (NLT)

When I wrote to you before, I told you not to associate with people who indulge in sexual sin. 10 But I wasn’t talking about unbelievers who indulge in sexual sin, or are greedy, or cheat people, or worship idols. You would have to leave this world to avoid people like that. 11 I meant that you are not to associate with anyone who claims to be a believer yet indulges in sexual sin, or is greedy, or worships idols, or is abusive, or is a drunkard, or cheats people. Don’t even eat with such people.

 

 

You may be involved in a difficult home relationship or a troubled relationship at work.

It may be a relationship with a family member or neighbor that has become testy.

Be the person that chooses to walk in love, choosing not to take account of the wrongs committed against you.

Treat the offending party as though they had done no wrong.

Treat them the way you want to be treated yourself.

Act in love towards them. Ignore the emotions of revenge or ill-will.

Focus on loving with this supernatural agape that God has placed in your spirit.

Meditate on 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 until it oozes out of you in words, tones, thought, motives, and actions.

Action Points:

1. How do you control your anger?

2. Are you easily offended?

3. Do you keep lists in your mind of others’ wrongs against you?

1Corinthians 13:4-8 – Translations

Let me describe love. It is slow to lose patience; love stays in difficult relationships with kindness, and it always looks for ways to be constructive.

There is no envy in love. It is not possessive and never boils over with jealousy.

Love makes no parade of itself; it never boasts, nor does it puff up with pride. Love is never arrogant and never puts itself on display, because it is neither anxious to impress, nor does it cherish inflated ideas of its own importance.

Love never gets irritated and is never resentful. Love holds no grudges, and it keeps no record of evil done to it. Love refuses to be provoked and never harbors evil thoughts. Love is not rude or grasping or overly sensitive, nor does love search for imperfections and faults in others. Love does not compile statistics of evil or gloat over the wickedness of other people.

On the contrary, it is glad with all good men when truth prevails. Love celebrates what is real and not what is perverse or incomplete. Love never does the graceless thing. Love has good manners and does not pursue selfish advantage.

Love never insists on its own rights, never irritably loses its temper, and never nurses its wrath to keep it warm. Love is not touchy. Love can stand any kind of treatment because there are no limits to its endurance, no end to its trust.

Love bears up under anything; it perseveres in all circumstances. Love’s first instinct is to believe in people. If you love someone, you will be loyal to him no matter what the cost. You will always believe in him, always expect the best in him, and always stand your ground in defending him.

Love never regards anyone or anything as hopeless. Love keeps up hope in everything. Love’s hope never fades. Love keeps on keeping on! It trusts in God in every situation and expects God to act in all circumstances.

Love goes on forever. Nothing can destroy love. Nothing can happen that can break love’s spirit. In fact, it is the one thing that still stands when all else has fallen.